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By Godwin the Poet

In Apology to My Love, Godwin the Poet reflects on a relationship that has changed with time. Through humour, heartbreak and playful metaphors, the poem follows a young speaker coming to terms with an uncomfortable truth: perhaps what he once called love was something he never fully understood.

Dear love,

I know a lot has changed,
From the sweet pea I once was
To the bitter lemon I have become.
And I do not mean to be rude,
But I hope you don’t mind
A change in diet.

You always ran through my mind,
But I think the race is now over.
And with these rising fuel prices,
It’s becoming harder to drive you crazy,
Because with each passing day,
It becomes even more expensive,
And I am not willing to pay the price.

I once texted you just for fun,
But not anymore.
Maybe because I’m a little too grown for that now.
I used to call you every single day
Just to hear your ticklish laughter,
But I can now hardly notice your voice,
Because every time I think about it,
I feel a fresh piercing in my heart.

You always made me feel alive,
But time has taught me the real me:
The real me who is walking,
But dead on the inside;
Smiling on the outside,
But bearing loads of thoughts
Inside my buried brain.

Thoughts so heavy,
So heavy that I can hardly feel my head.

So, I won’t lie that I miss you,
Because every time I hugged you,
I felt stabs reach deep into my heart—
Stabs for the shows I always put up.

I loved you for them to think I was cool,
Because if I’m being honest,
I’ve never known what love is.

Sorry,
Not even with you.

— Godwin the Poet

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